When Clio and Ricky attended the course with me they were on a different journey towards birth, but one week before their baby made their appearance they got into the hospital homebirth program! Here is their pregnancy, birth and postpartum journey…
Wow what a beautiful journey we are on. Thank you for your support in checking in, and as well helping set us up for the most beautiful birth we could have imagined.
Your well wishes must have worked because we got into the Homebirth program a week before bubba came. Still… we were open to whatever pathway our birth was to take yet we could not have imagined anything better than the flow it had.
My waters released on Friday the 15th, around 2am, 39weeks and 5days. Thank you for offering a real space of communication for partners in your course, because we chose this early stage to voice our fears and disappointments of what this meant. A letting go and our first surrender to the unknown path of birth.
We then put on some hypnobirthing tracks to read and get me back to sleep but they weren’t working. I had listened to one every day leading up to birth and they seemed to have done their magic. They had relaxed me for daily upkeep and their messages of focus were inbuilt in me now. We switched it off and Ricky lead me through a spontaneous meditation before we drifted into sleep. The surges started gently and slowly, but I was able to rest and sleep in between.
Thank you for empowering both of us with options in birthing skills. We danced through trying all our different techniques… movement, birth ball, massage, music, breath, counting, positions…. Thank you for sharing these even though they didn’t all work but it was the freedom and relief of knowing we had options to try.
Thank you for the introduction of touch from the partner. Ricky intuitively and skilfully worked with my body. He massaged, held pressure points to ground me and hold me, he supported my body weight when I would collapse into his body.
Thank you for the introduction of different positions, I found my strength in all fours. Most surges would come, and straight into all fours. It didn’t take the sensation away but I felt grounded, literally with the ground in a strong way.
Thank you for the introduction of the tens machine. We stuck this on around 6-7am. I am not sure if I felt instant pain relief but I found it helpful. It was another sensation to focus on during the surges. It also helped my mind relax knowing something else was working with my body. It was essential in linking my partner and I. It was a communication tool for when I was going into surges. I would either press it or yell surge to him, so he knew when I was going on. He loved the fact it timed it for us. And that helped remind me…something my midwife said to me…birth is just 60 seconds. That’s all you need to manage to be with. 60 seconds.
That’s where my vocalisation practice came in. I’ve been doing a vocal meditation practice for over 5yrs now. And it came into play naturally, not like a technique but it was just my way. 60 seconds of giving my voice and then rest in the silence in between, opening my hearing. 60 seconds to drink and pour love, sip and give. My voice changed from gentle hums on each exhale to soaring my voice as far as I could when I was bearing down. All techniques I had learnt but didn’t consciously choose. It just was.
And I think that’s where the hypnobirthing ties in with what my vocal practice has taught me over the years. Soften to signal trust. It’s not softening to have no pain. But soften your mind you awareness towards the sensation and instantly more space is there. As you and the tracks reminded me, it is natural and my body knows what to do. As a generally nervous and anxious person, I thought I wouldn’t be able to trust. But it wasn’t a choice. I could only trust. I could only trust in nature. She guided me through and at no point did I really feel scared. Because I wasn’t looking ahead. Just fully in the moment at one with nature. At one with the sensation arising.
There was one point which I thought an epidural and hospital was needed and I expressed to Ricky in his arms… I can’t. But the thought was another sensation arising and then just like that it was gone from both of us. In the matrona holistic stages of birth I had read at the top of the mountain where the woman has gone further than before, she will reach out for help but this is not a genuine ask for intervention. And so it was gone and I transitioned to pushing… but I didn’t tell anyone for a while because I was just in it. This was just after Ricky gave me a few sniffs of clary sage which I soooo enjoyed.
Beautiful Ricky trusted me too. We danced together and then he left me alone in moments to tend to it fully. I always felt him there. And then after I had been pushing I told him to tell the midwives that I had the urge to push, just because I wasn’t really sure if what I was doing was actually bearing down. So they made their way over and Ricky began setting up the pool, moving me over onto the one towel not on a drop sheet as he set that up. As the first midwife was arriving I reached down and told Ricky I felt the head. I had been focusing on holding her head down in a surge as it was slipping up and down. Ricky ran down to get the midwife and alert of the urgency we hadn’t realised. They returned calm and trusting, set up what was needed around me. I was still on that one towel not on the drop sheet and on the white carpet. The midwife guided me to hold at I believe what was the ring of fire, and my breath changed. Just breath no sound. It was stingy but a needed moment to pause. Then in one surge, I moved back from all fours moving my hands onto my thighs and staying on my knees, one voice exhale released the head, one breath held, next voice exhale released the rest of her body into Ricky’s hands. Not once did I think of the other end of the exhale, I trusted Ricky had it. I trusted bubba had it. The home birth situation really helped with this. Knowing I didn’t have to move or leave, that I was home and this was natural. The process, the sensations, were all leading me to meet our power, our bub and true nature. We particularly loved that we were designed for this, our uterus and our bodies and our hearts. These thoughts engrained in us from hypnobirthing.
And there she was in our arms. I reclined comfortably on my back (for the first time in ages because I had been so focused on correct posture so I was not posterior) on this pillow fort Ricky built. In peace and awe, the three of us lay together. Eventually we lifted her up to see she was female.
We birthed the placenta not too long after and the other midwives showed up and hung around comfortably for a few hours. We lay back to settle in to this whole new world. Boobs kicked into gear and breast feeding went on it’s way with Bub finding it like a natural. The midwives were amazing in supporting our needs and informing us with all the after birth stuff that didn’t seem like our job to know, we just had to love her now.
Koa Dou-Sing Klein
Strength, guided by the stars
Life now seems like extended birth. Meeting every moment alive giving love. Trusting her, trusting ourselves, trusting each other, trusting nature as the path is.
There’s more to our story like hilarious poos and sandy beach towels. But I won’t bother you with those details. Maybe one day when we meet in person again.
We just wanted to share the true bits which your guidance truly assisted and helped us. For these bits we are truly grateful.
Thank you for all your support
You do amazing stuff for people
Clio and Ricky